Kerfuffle

Eleven bits of film dialogue that were made funnier by Leslie Nielsen's delivery

1. Frank: It's the same old story. Boy finds girl, boy loses girl, girl finds boy, boy forgets girl, boy remembers girl, girls dies in a tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year's Day.
   Jane: Goodyear?
   Frank: No, the worst.
2. Mayor: Now Drebin, I don't want any trouble like you had on the South Side last year, that's my policy.
   Frank: Well, when I see five weirdos, dressed in togas, stabbing a man in the middle of the park in full view of a hundred people, I shoot the bastards, that's *my* policy!
   Mayor: That was a Shakespeare-In-The-Park production of 'Julius Caesar,' you moron! You killed five actors! Good ones!
3. Frank: That's the red-light district. I wonder why Savage is hanging around down there.
   Ed: Sex, Frank?
   Frank: Uh, no, not right now, Ed.
4. I'd known her for years. We used to go to all the police functions together. Ah, how I loved her, but she had her music. I think she had her music. She'd hang out with the Chicago Male Chorus and Symphony. I don't recall her playing an instrument or being able to carry a tune. Yet she was on the road 300 days of the year. In fact, I bought her a harp for Christmas. She asked me what it was.
5. Rumack: You'd better tell the Captain we've got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital.
   Elaine Dickinson: A hospital? What is it?
   Rumack: It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now.
6. Rumack: Can you fly this plane, and land it?
   Ted Striker: Surely you can't be serious.
   Rumack: I am serious... and don't call me Shirley.
7. Rumack: Well, I don't have anything to say, you've done the best you could. You really have, the best you could. You can't expect to win em all. But, I want to tell you something I've kept to myself through these years. I was in the war myself, medical corps. I was on late duty one night when they brought in a badly wounded pilot from one of the raids. He could barely talk. He looked at me and said, "The odds were against us up there, but we went in anyway, I'm glad the Captain made the right decision." The pilot's name was George Zip.
   Ted Striker: George Zip said that?
   Rumack: The last thing he said to me, "Doc," he said, "some time when the crew is up against it, and the breaks are beating the boys, tell them to get out there and give it all they got and win just one for the Zipper. I don't know where I'll be then, Doc," he said, "but I won't smell too good, that's for sure."
8. Rumack: Captain, how soon can you land?
   Captain Oveur: I can't tell.
   Rumack: You can tell me. I'm a doctor.
   Captain Oveur: No. I mean I'm just not sure.
   Rumack: Well, can't you take a guess?
   Captain Oveur: Well, not for another two hours.
   Rumack: You can't take a guess for another two hours?
9. Rumack: What was it we had for dinner tonight?
   Elaine Dickinson: Well, we had a choice of steak or fish.
   Rumack: Yes, yes, I remember, I had lasagna.
10. Rumack: I won't deceive you, Mr. Striker. We're running out of time.
    Ted Striker: Surely there must be something you can do.
    Rumack: I'm doing everything I can... and stop calling me Shirley!
11. President Bush: Frank, please consider filling a post I'm creating. It may mean long hours and dangerous nights, surrounded by some of the scummiest elements in our society.
    Frank: You want me to be in your cabinet?

Funny guy, even though he didn't intend to be when he got into acting.

Leslie Nielsen, 1926-2010

Shamelessly perloined from HuffPo.

So what IS the deal with this whole Twilight thing, anyway?

Ever wonder why Twilight is so popular with your mom, sister, or girlfriend (and perhaps gay pal)?  I mean, really, what is up with that?

The nice people at epiphio and TheOatmeal.com try to explain...

Of course, they may be wrong.  I can't read that junk.

[As an aside, it really is worth your time to visit epiphio's YouTube channel.  These folks do great work.]

Creativity is not a waste of time, regardless of what some will say

Looking back, I realize that I was very fortunate to have parents who supported my creative endeavors, however mediocre they may have been.  I also appreciate that I worked for a long time at an ad agency where  management (for the most part) fostered a culture that allowed us the freedom to fail. 

Creativity needs room and time and encouragement to grow, and kids need to know creative activities are not a waste of time.  That's why so many people including myself credit Michael Giacchino, composer of the original score to the film Up, with delivering a most memorable and meaningful acceptance speech at the Academy Awards presentation last night...

“When I was 9, I asked my dad, ‘Can I have your movie camera? That old, wind up 8 millimeter camera that was in your drawer?’ And he goes, ‘sure, take it.’   And I started making movies with it, and I started being as creative as I could. And never once in my life did my parents ever say, ‘What you’re doing is a waste of time.’   Never.  And I grew up;  I had teachers, I had colleagues, I had people that I worked with all through my life who were always telling me, ‘What you’re doing is not a waste of time.’  So that was normal to me, that it was OK to do that. I know there are kids out there who don’t have that support system. So if you’re out there and you’re listening, listen to me:  If you want to be creative, get out there and do it; it’s not a waste of time.  Do it.”

Well said, Mr. Giacchino.  Well said.

Best.  Acceptance. Speech. Ever.

Here's part of the beautiful piece of music for which he won the Oscar, one that should leave you smiling...

Dom Deluise must have been hilarious to hang around with, not that I'd know personally. I only wish...

Dom Deluise died yesterday in Los Angeles at the age of 75, surrounded by his family.

In my opinion, he was one of the funniest comedic actors around.  He was able to take small roles and make them the most memorable in a film.  My personal favorite is his turn as Buddy Bizarre, a movie director whose set is invaded by cowboys on horseback in Mel Brooks' "Blazing Saddles."

Deluise appeared in over 100 films and several television shows.  I remember his first series, which debuted in the fall of 1973, lasting but one season.  It was called Lotsa Luck, in which he played Stanley Belmont,  the guy who ran the lost and found at the New York City bus terminal.  Carl Reiner, close friend and one-time comedic partner of Mel Brooks, created the show and supervised the writing.  The show's short life may have been due, in part, to the show's pretty edgy writing.  Nonetheless, Deluise impressed enough people to grab a Golden Globe nomination for his work as Stanley.

I don't know why, but I still remember a line from the show that I found hilarious:  "Yeah, my father.  He was the only man I knew who could sweat while swimming." It may not have been the line itself as much as the delivery. 

Funny, funny guy.

Sometimes a good movie is just a good movie

The combination of having a pretty cool home theater and an addiction to Amazon.com has led me to watch a lot of movies that never played your average suburban multiplex.  Some of the best films I have seen in the past year or so most people have probably never heard of.  Many have been foreign films, since having that remote allows one to back up for a missed subtitle for those times when the film itself was so engaging that reading the dialogue was accidentally overlooked.

Many of the films I've watched here have come from independent producers, likely because the films were not deemed financially viable by the big studios. Such is almost always the case with films that fall into the category of "gay cinema."  Even the breakout hit Brokeback Mountain was an independent film.  Aside from rare exceptions such as Philadelphia and Victor Victoria, the major studios are unwilling to take a risk on gay-themed films.  Unfortunately, in many cases, their concerns are justified.  The only reason some gay themed movies are made at all is because there are gay audiences who will buy and watch almost anything gay. Trust me; I know.  I've bought and watched many films with gay story lines that are bad.  Really bad.

It's great to come across a movie that is a gay movie that is a good movie because it's a good movie, not because it's a gay movie.  The acting, the story, the production and the casting all come together to tell a great story.  Shelter is one of these films.

Shelter is the story of a young man who has sacrificed a lot of his own personal happiness to help his sister raise her son and take care of their disabled father.  He reconnects with the older brother of his best friend and surfing buddy, and the relationship that develops plays out in a very well-told and beautifully filmed story.  (A synopsis from the film's website can be found here.) It's refreshing to come across a gem like this:  a good film that happens to have a gay story line that shouldn't and hopefully won't be dismissed as "a gay surfer movie" the way Brokeback Mountain was "the gay cowboy movie".  Credit the folks at Here! Films, as it has been their goal to produce and release films that are good first, and of a GLBT nature second.  Some of their other films, such as Fat Girls, Cut Sleeve Boys, and Race You To The Bottom suggest to me they are off to a good start.

If you want to have your own little gay film festival some rainy weekend, and you want to see movies that are better than most of the mainstream dreck that is littering movies screens across the country, I can suggest a nice mix.  In addition to Shelter, consider...

• Cowboys and Angels
• Dorian Blues 
• Sommersturm (Summer Storm) 
• Le Ciel sur la Tệte (Times Have Been Better)

The last two are foreign language films, German and French respectively.  Both are well subtitled, and are worth the extra effort. None of these should wig out closet homophobes (too much) in that they really don't dwell on sex, making it only an incidental part of the story telling process.

Should I at some point feel so inspired, I will put together the companion posts to this one.  Really, Really Bad Gay Themed Films should be easy.  And Gayish Movies that are So Bad They're Good should be fun in an odd kind of way.

Brian Sloan is a funny, funny (gay) guy

Earlier today, I thought I was going to get kicked out of the "Quiet Car™"on Amtrak's Hiawatha heading down to Chicago. The reason would have been the outbursts of laughter caused by reading Brian Sloan's book, A Really Nice Prom Mess. Library Journal lists it as a book for Grade 9 - Adult. Even though I'm our library board's president, I'm not sure what to make of that. I guess maybe it's a PG book with a reading level to match. I don't know. All I know is that it's hilarious. To be sure, the fact that it tells the tale of a closeted high school senior who gets suckered into taking a fake date to his prom by his ultra-closeted boyfriend gives it a certain gay appeal. But I have to think anyone who looks back at their prom with equal measures of fondness and horror will get a kick out of it.

Although it was published in 2005, I just stumbled upon "Prom Mess" after first reading Sloan's newer novel, A Tale of Two Summers. It, too, is written for a younger audience, and is no less entertaining.

I first came to be familiar with Brain Sloan when I saw WTC View, a movie he directed, based on the stage play he wrote shortly after 9-11. (Read more from IMDB here. Note the film stars Michael Urie, better known as Marc on Ugly Betty.)

Whether a play, movie or book, I can't wait for Sloan's next effort.

In support of the striking WGA writers...

Without the right words, actors ain't shit.

Enjoy the raft of reality shows that will be taking the place of the decent stuff still to be found on TV if you look hard enough.

A different kind of Fright Night

Rendition is, quite simply, a scary movie. Not scary like "BOO! It's Halloween." Scary like "Holy shit! Can something like this really happen in the US?"

The Life and Times of Petey Greene

Until a few weeks ago, I had never heard of Ralph Waldo "Petey" Greene, Jr. But after seeing the new film "Talk To Me," I have a real appreciation for his contribution to both civil rights and to the media. Petey Greene came out of prison and quickly became a major fore in local talk radio in Washington D.C. during the late sixties. With talent honed only at a PA-system-broadcast "radio station" where he was serving time for armed robbery, he talked and cajoled his way into a radio gig at WOL that made him the voice of the people, as he would characterize himself.

The film stars Don Cheadle as Greene and Chiwetel Ejiofor as Dewey Hughes. It was Hughes who gave Greene his start on radio, although he did so almost against his better judgement. Most poignant was how the film depicts the streets of Washington hours after Martin Luther King Jr. was assassinated. It was Greene who would be credited with calming the city's anger and helping to re-channel rage into power.

Casting and timing, two key elements when assembling a strong supporting cast, do not disappoint. Cedric The Entertainer, who I mostly remember for his Bud Light commercials, does a great turn as the late night romantic voice on WOL. Martin Sheen delivers as E.G. Sonderling, the station's owner who recognizes that a bunch of white men in grey suites are not the ones who will make an African American-targeted station successful moving forward. Taraji P. Henson, as Greene's longtime girlfriend provides both humor and raw emotion when needed. But perhaps the best character role performance is turned in by Alison Sealy-Smith as Freda, Sonderling's secretary. She proves small roles can be some of the best, and her nearly 50 IMDB credits suggest a lot of casting directors know this too.

Talk To Me is not in the same wide release showing as, say, The Simpson's Movie. But it is worth looking for.